


Falling Into Heaven

by AbraxasBelzebub



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, POV Change, Suicidal Reader, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, depressed reader
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-26
Updated: 2017-02-26
Packaged: 2018-09-26 23:12:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,569
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9928226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AbraxasBelzebub/pseuds/AbraxasBelzebub
Summary: // She seemed so small, sobbing in his arms. He started to hum some elusive melody quietly while his heart wept with her. //





	

**Author's Note:**

> I suffer from depressions for a long time now and around the beginning of this year I felt really bad. that's when this idea popped into my head and as I couldn't sleep anyway I decided to try and write it down and now to post it, as I myself like to read fanfictions about depressed reader and one of the characters I like trying to be there for them. So I thought maybe there are others who feel that way too and would find some sort of catharsis into what I've written...?

(Y/N) P.O.V

 

You were back in the bunker, in your room. You sat on your bed, or rather slumped down on it, looking down at your bandaged forearms brokenly. You heard Dean say something to Sammy or Cass but you didn’t pay attention as to what it was. When you didn’t hear the door closing you looked up, seeing a sour looking Dean looking straight back at you. Deep frown hardening his naturally soft features harshly, fire and hurt in his eyes. It seemed like he wanted to say something but couldn’t really find the words, which in turn seemed to make him even more angry. You sighed. “Why won’t you just let me die...” Your voice surprisingly devoid of any emotion. “NO!” You jumped slightly at the unexpected outburst from Dean, your eyes widening. “Just NO! And don’t you DARE to run off and try to pull off that stunt again! We were worried sick! You know Cass can’t heal you! Fuck, we thought we’ve lost you!” Somewhere in the middle Dean started pacing in front of the not entirely closed door. You heard his words but all the anger in it made you feel again. Anger seeped into you like a poisonous fire fueled by all the pain that made you want to die in the first place.

You didn’t even realize that you stood up as you started screaming back at him. “Yeah! Get fucking angry! Let me feel your anger because THAT’S SO FUCKING HELPFUL! MAKE ME FEEL how TRULY USELESS AND TERRIBLE OF A PERSON I AM JUST CAUSING OTHERS PAIN IN MY WAKE!” You took a hasty breath. “SO THE NEXT TIME I CAN FUCKING KILL MYSELF PROPERLY!!!” Your face twisted in rage and the ever present pain, your breathing ragged.

Dean wasn’t pacing anymore, instead he stood still now like a deer caught in the headlights, his face terrified now instead of angry. He clearly didn’t see that coming. His mouth started opening as if to say something but you didn’t let him. “GET OUT! GET OUT NOW!” He said your name in a weak protest. You made a few steps, raising your hands ready to push him out physically if needed. “OUT!” He took a step back, seemingly at a loss for words for once and before you could actually reach him he got out of the door.

As soon as he was out of the room you slammed the door close with all the power you’ve got, the noise seemingly carrying through the whole bunker.

In a few swift steps you got back to the bed, putting your hands into your hair, while sitting back down on it. It seemed like you’ve reached your limit of tears in the past weeks and months as none more left your eyes now, despite you being more agitated than ever. Your chest felt like it would burst any second.

You breathed through your nose, as though your lips were slightly parted, your teeth were pressed firmly together in distress, making your jaw ache.

This needed to end, slitting your wrists again wasn’t an option nor were the pills. They were all just not quick enough. Not final enough. Not final quick enough. A gun crossed your mind. A gun to the head should be quick and final enough for you to end your suffering. Pity you never asked the brothers to teach you how to shoot, but it couldn’t be that hard right? People were shooting themselves on accident all the time. And you watched Sam and Dean taking care of their guns seemingly countless times so maybe that could get in handy too. You’d just need enough time to get one of the guns, probably Dean’s as he left them lying around everywhere, whereas Sam was more careful, especially with other people than his brother around.

After getting the gun (which hopefully would be loaded too) you’d go down to the shooting range of the bunker where you could try the gun out first before putting it to your head and blasting your brains out. You slightly nodded to yourself and let the scenario play out in your head an indefinite amount of times.

 

You didn’t know how much time passed until you finally stood up determined to put your plan into motion. You went out of your room like in a trance, made sure to close the door behind you. Without hesitation you turned left first, intending to go to the room the Winchesters tended to keep demons in, if they wanted to keep them alive. You were hoping to find a weapon in there, but as you strode forwards you realized the door to Dean’s room was open and the man wasn’t in there.

Great. That would shorten everything. You went in and didn’t even have to look around. A handgun laid on the night table, right beside the few pictures of the hunters loved ones that he possessed. You didn’t pay enough attention to consciously notice them, but you’ve seen them all before so you knew. You took the gun carefully not to rearrange anything else.

You took a breath of relief, the weight of the gun in your hand calming you and clearing your mind from any unnecessary thoughts.

Step after step you stalked back down the corridor, past your room in the direction of the library that you needed to cross to go to the shooting practice room.

You distanced yourself to the point where you didn’t even panic seeing Sammy in the library.

He looked up from whichever book he read and apparently seen the gun in your hand. “Hey (Y/N), what are you up to with that gun?” He asked with caution in his voice, and the slightest frown on his face, which you didn’t see as you never stopped or acknowledged seeing him. But without thinking about it you answered anyway, too far gone in your head to care.

“Learning to shoot.” Brief and true.

“Why’s that all of a sudden?” asked Sam again, with something that might have been suspicion but you didn’t care enough to analyze.

“To shoot myself in the head.” You answered emotionlessly and also true. You didn’t know if Sam asked anything else or even heard your answer because by now you crossed the library and were on your way down to the shooting range.

 

* * *

Dean’s P.O.V

 

So maybe getting all angry wasn’t Dean’s smoothest move. He looked at his mirror image and sighed. It’s been hours since the shouting “incident”. He left her alone so she could calm down and to calm down himself. He was goddamn scared of what she was saying and how she was saying it. Like death wasn’t anything bad, like dying was the easiest thing ever. He died a lot, and there were times where he even wished to die himself but… still, he could never kill himself. On the other side Sam often enough accused him of trying to kill himself slowly with all the whiskey and kamikaze-missions. And then this anger… She wasn’t the calmest person but he has never seen or heard her so furious.

The older Winchester sighed heavily. He needed to check up on her at least but he needed to be calm enough not to get angry again, as that didn’t bring any desirable results.

He rubbed his forehead tiredly. “Come on Dean! You’re good with the ladies and you’ve definitely faced worse!” He said to his mirror image but an annoying voice in his head told him that he doesn’t stand a chance with thise kind of monsters. Regardless he turned his back to the mirror and went to check out on (Y/N).

 

In front of her door he took a deep calming breath and knocked. No answer. He knocked again. Still nothing. Slight panic started to raise in him. He got a bad feeling but tried to push it down, he was just freaking out after what happened in the past few days, or that’s what he told himself. He knocked again, this time louder and called out her name.

“(Y/N)?” He waited, listening for any noise in a nervous anticipation. But again nothing happened.

“Ok (Y/N), if you don’t answer me I’m gonna go in!” He said a bit louder and probably meaner than he intended, but by now he was full blown worried.

After he didn’t get any answer once again he opened the door. She wasn’t there. He hastily looked around as if hoping she would jump out form under the bed or the closet. “Damn!” He turned around almost jogging to the library in the hopes of finding her there, after all she liked to read the books, even if they were written in a language she didn’t speak. Silly really, but when he asked her about it, she said she liked to see if she would understand some words based on the languages she knew already and maybe learn some knew ones. He only gave her the look he always gave Sammy when his brother would do some stuff he thought weird or nerdy and proceeded to devour his burger. Now he hoped she was just being weird and nerdy again instead of….the alternative.

In the library he almost run into Sam, who was just behind the corner.

“Sam! Have you seen (Y/N)?” He asked right away, seeing the slight frown on the younger ones face.

“Yes, I was just about to follow her. She had your gun and...” Sam hesitated.

Hearing she had his gun made the alarm bells in Dean’s head ring wildly. But she didn’t know how to shoot, right? It would be all fine, he tried to calm himself down once again but the annoying voice in his head just laughed menacingly.

“And what Sam?!” He demanded impatiently.

“Well...I’m not sure if I heard it right but… I think she said she wanted to shoot herself. That’s why I wanted to follow her.”

Dean didn’t wait until his brother finished the last sentence and after hearing the first one he bolted in the direction of the shooting range, as that was the direction Sam was facing when Dean bumped into him. “Please, let it not be too late...” He muttered to himself distressed, and to God if he by any chance was listening after all. He wouldn’t hear any shots here if the door to the shooting range was closed.

 

* * *

(Y/N) P.O.V

 

You were almost running the nearer you got to the shooting range. You barged in there, hastily closing the door behind you and locking it. Adrenalin pumping through your blood by now. You should have been sneakier, instead you just disclosed your plans. You needed to be quick in case Sam would follow you. Locking the door should give you more than enough of that though as it was one massive door, that didn’t let much noise escape. That’s why you locked it right away, leaning on it afterward. You looked down at the gun in your hand. It was one you recognized, Dean seemed to always have it around with him. It had a white handle and you always wondered how he got it, as white didn’t seem to be his color.

Will he ever even use it again after you killed yourself? Or will he throw it away? Probably the first one to always remember and blame himself for one more death he couldn’t stop.

You sighed. There was no time to waste.

 

* * *

Dean’s P.O.V

 

Dean was panting slightly after the sprint from library to the shooting range. He immediately tried to open the door but it was locked. “Damn!” There was no way she’d hear him inside but he had to try. “(Y/N)! Open the door!” No answer so he tried banging on it but nothing happened. The hunter punched the door in frustration not accomplishing anything but a sharp pain in his right Hand. He heard a dull sound from behind the door. A shot. His eyes widened in panic. “Don’t be dead don’t be dead don’t be dead.” But it would be his fault if she killed herself this time. Instead of being supportive he got angry and pushed her to the breaking point before she could even start healing, physically and mentally.

What was he supposed to do now? There was no way for him to open the door from the outside as it didn’t have a lock that could be opened by a key or be picked by something else. He shut his eyes close, his whole face scrunched up with concentration. “Castiel! Get over here I need you! (Y/N) needs you!” He prayed angrily. “C’mon you feathery bastard, there is no time!”

He heard another shot from the room which caught his breath in his throat while his heart seemed to have skipped a beat. A rustling of feathers made breathing possible again, Dean turned around and there stood his only hope in his customary beige coat, looking as confused and worried as ever.

He closed the short distance between them and caught the wayward angel firmly by his shoulders. “Cass, you need to open that door! NOW” He basically screamed in Castiel’s face.

Seeing the urgency in Dean’s eyes the angel didn’t hesitate to step around him and put his hands on the door. His power was greatly diminished but Dean had faith, for once. It just had to work. Seconds passed like minutes and the green-eyed man was torn between not wanting to hear another shot and wanting to hear one in hopes it wasn’t the killing one just so he knew it wasn’t too late yet.

 

* * *

(Y/N) P.O.V

 

You managed to make the gun work. It was damn loud but it worked, first you shot holding it with both of your hands. The second shot was to try the same with one hand, after all that was what you needed to be able to do when shooting yourself in the head.

You were pretty sure that none of the targets caught any of the two bullets but that didn’t matter as long as the third one would not miss.

You turned away from the targets and sat down on the floor a few steps away. On the border of your awareness you realized that someone must have been at the door, some very faint noises were reaching you and someone definitely tried to open the door at one point. There wasn’t much time, you needed to hurry. You took a look at the gun to make sure everything was prepared to just pull the trigger. A few deep breaths to calm yourself, as you didn’t want to miss because your hand was shaking so badly. Slowly you put the gun to your head, positioning it so the bullet would go in slightly behind your right temple. You felt slight excitement filling you, finally after so many years it would end. You savored the moment, breathing as evenly as you could, your finger steady on the trigger.

 

* * *

Dean’s P.O.V

 

The second Dean heard the door unlocking he burst through it not wanting to waste another precious second. She was there, apparently still alive, eyes closed a gun to her head. He quickly jumped in her direction yanking her arm up and away from her head and as it turned out just in time. The gun fired while Dean was still raising her arm but thankfully as it already was above her head. He gripped her hand roughly, pulling the gun out of it and throwing it away from both of them.

It was so close. Too close. He looked at her, her expression unbelieving. “Why did you do that?! Why did you do it again, why won’t you let me die?!” Her voice shrill and panicked, tears finally streaming down her face. As much as he hated to see her cry, it was calming him. Since he found her unconscious and bleeding from her cut wrists in the woods a few days ago he didn’t see her shed a tear. It was unsettling, the indifference, the only emotional outburst being the shouting in her room after they got back from the hospital.

He fully sat on the floor and pulled her into a hug, or tried but she started hitting him on the chest asking him the same question again and again. Dean didn’t let go and her from the beginning weak hits got weaker until subsiding entirely. That’s when he gently pulled her closer until her head leaned on his chest and circled his arms around her, his hand rubbing her back slowly, soothingly. The hunter carefully angled his left leg to sit a bit more comfortably not lessening his hold on her. She seemed so small, sobbing in his arms. He started to hum some elusive melody quietly while his heart wept with her.

 

* * *

 

(Y/N) P.O.V

 

Your breathing evened out and got slower.

In.

It was just that and the seemingly endless stream of tears running down your cheeks.

Out.

No sobbing.

In.

You were so exhausted.

Out.

You weren’t dead.

In.

But you felt too tired to panic about it.

Out.

You felt Dean’s chest move under you steadily.

In. Out. In.

You felt his hand running up and down your back.

Up.

Slowly.

Down. Up. Down. Up.

It was weird how steady his chest moved even though he was humming.

In. Out. Up. Down.

You concentrated on the melody.

In. Out.

You didn’t think you knew it.

Up. Down.

Still...it sounded familiar.

“Dean…?” You surprised yourself. But you were too quiet, your voice more of a ghostly breath than anything else so he didn’t hear you.

“Dean?” You tried again, louder but still far from your normal talking volume. He shifted slightly and stopped humming.”Yes (Y/N)?” His voice sounded soothing like his whole presence, not breaking this strange atmosphere that felt like it could shatter effortlessly though. It made you somewhat anxious to speak up again and Dean didn’t urge you to, just waited uncharacteristically patient.

“Why...” You cleared your throat slightly. “Why don’t you want me to die so badly…?” You asked slowly in the same quiet volume hoping to keep this strange bubble surrounding you for a bit longer.

He shifted again, his hands wandered to your shoulders gently gripping them and pushing you slightly. Away from his chest. Your mind spun dizzily in a weak attempt to panic but was too exhausted to do anything more but frantically sending a message through your head. _I’s gonna shatter! You’re gonna fall. It’ll hurt._ He put his hand on your left cheek, the other still on your shoulder. His green eyes staring straight at you.

All the hair that fellonto your face must have irritated him because he raised his right hand and carefully brushed them to the side, putting the longer strands behind your ear. You briefly closed your eyes at those ministrations, marveling at how the strange atmosphere still didn’t shatter after so much motion.

It was his turn to clear throat before he spoke, slowly...carefully? Like he wasn’t sure how to put his thoughts into words. Or maybe just not sure what to say at all.“I… like you. You are weird. And all over the place sometimes...but you made this bunker feel more like home for me. Someone to get back to from the hunts, not only the empty building. Me and Sammy actually started to looking forward to coming back the past few months.” He paused and looked down, his eyes unfocused as if looking at something only he could see.

Then he seemed to have decided on something as he tensed a little and looked back at you with a mix of determination and uncertainty in his eyes. You wondered briefly what was going on in his head, waiting for him to finish his answer.

A few long seconds passed until he finally spoke, his voice not showing any of the insecurity his eyes betrayed. “I like you you know? … I mean… I don’t know if I am in love with you but I like you a lot. And I want to have the chance to figure it out.”

You opened your mouth slightly. Something in you stirred. Now it was your turn to look down. Something akin to panic stirring inside you. You weren’t expecting anything like this, not like that, not now, not ever. You didn’t know what to think...how to think for a moment, your mind still numbed by what you attempted to do and still craved.

You took a deep breath to try and help you think of what to say. Dean tensed up by now enough for you to feel it and you were sure he was still looking at you, watching your face closely. Dean fucking Winchester was nervous about what YOU of all people felt about him. He who could dazzle seemingly every woman effortlessly and who you’ve seen disappear with them countless times somewhere. Each of them gorgeous and graceful or strong and beautiful or all of that at once. Nothing like you.

You slowly tilted your head back up still not looking him in the eyes, and rather looking through him than anything else. Your voice barely a whisper.

“It didn’t take long until I liked you, adored you even, when I got to know you. But you weren’t real to me so whatever crush I might have had was irrelevant anyway… Then I actually met you in person. It was so strange to see you standing in front of me after...seeing you so often on the TV… but I didn’t really know if you were as I thought you were… and honestly I didn’t think you’d find me interesting enough to like me not to mention anything else… I …“ You stopped, not sure how to proceed, your mind still so blank. Pulling your thoughts or any feelings, that weren’t this drowning sadness, out of the corners of your soul was difficult. Still you pushed on, you felt like you needed to.

“I don’t know if love you either… I am… so tired… I’ve been so tired for so long. I can’t say.” You paused again briefly, just breathing even though it was such a draining task.

“I like you too I think… I just ...” You shook your head weakly and finally looked him in the eyes focusing on the big green orbs. “...want it all to end.” You finished, your breathing heavier after talking this much. Deans tension lessened just slightly, his face full of sadness. Helplessness written all over it. He swallowed.

“(Y/N) please...don’t. I will be there I promise. I won’t leave you alone and we will figure it all out. Even if...I mean...one way or another, you are family. I’ve lost so many people I care about, please stay…and we will fight it together.” He said it all carefully, as if weighting each word he said very carefully before using it.

“So what..? You’ll stop hunting and babysit me in the hopes I’m just gonna get better?” You were slightly irritated. At his stubbornness and the fact that you still had to breath. Though you didn’t have to wait as his answer came quicker than you expected. “Yes I would. As long as it’d help.” He said.

“You can’t. The world needs you, the people… even heaven and hell. You can’t stop hunting. Just...please...let me go.”

“No...I can’t do that. I will take care of you, I will help you.”

You sighed heavily hearing his answer. “It’s either you give me the gun and let me kill myself. You’ll hurt some but you’ll get over the pain eventually and move on and I will be released from the pain too. Or… “ You felt Dean watch you intensively, listening carefully to what you were saying. “You make me stay alive, in pain. Suffering. And make yourself and Sam suffer for as long as I’ll live in the false hope that things will get better… Choose carefully. Either you let things happen the way they are supposed to, or you make a deal with a demon...”

Your throat felt so dry at the end that it hurt slightly. If you wouldn’t be so tense you even might have had laughed at the dramatic phrase you used at the end, but as it was, humor seemed like something foreign and long forgotten. It seemed as if the time didn’t hurry at all, every second seemed so painful. Nothing happened for an eternity it seemed, but you just waited, resigned. The rest of your energy left you with the words you said. The numbness of your mind and the throbbing pain in your soul not letting your state ease in the slightest.

Dean gently put his right hand on your cheek, which made your eyes focus back at him instead of starring into nothing. Softly he said to you. “You know how demons seal their deals...” You didn’t have the time to tell if it was a question or a statement before his face came closer and closer to yours. And then…

You were falling.

It was...peaceful.

His full delicate lips wrapped your thinner ones in the softest embrace. Not moving, just pressing ever so slightly against you, caressing with warmth that passed beyond the skin.

It was just a fragment of a moment and yet a whole eternity passed until he slowly retreated, but just slightly. You could feel his breath on your face when you spoke quietly, absentmindedly, more to yourself than to him.

“It was like drifting into fluffy clouds...”

Subsequently you slouched until your head landed on his shoulder and you were fully leaning on him. ‘So who’s soul gotten traded now?’ Was what lazily passed through your foggy mind.

 

You barely registered that he rearranged your limbs around him and stood up carrying you by putting his arms under your thighs, your arms hung uselessly over his broad shoulders. Silent tears were streaming down your face.

Step by step by step you two were moving. It felt strangely surreal.

Were was he taking you? You wondered. Will he bring you to your room?

You got scared, your breath hitching in panic, your previously passively hanging arms gripped him tight, your face pressed into his neck. You couldn’t be alone! He made you stay alive, was he going to abandon you now, after doing what was ‘right’?

Dean slowed down and then paused his walk altogether, but before he could say anything you stuttered out brokenly. “P-please! Don’t leave me alone...” You started sobbing and clutched at the man holding you like other people held onto life. In a way it was accurate as he was the only thing between you and death.  
Despite your panicked state you felt him readjust you in his arms.

“I’m here... I’m staying with you, I promise.” His voice was calm and strong but not very loud, yet it managed to calm you down slightly. Your sobbing softened but your grip stayed firm on him. He didn’t seem to mind.

 

Dean’s P.O.V

 

If it was possible he felt even more heartbroken after her little outburst. Did she truly think he’d just dump her in her room and leave? His brows furrowed at the mere thought of leaving her alone right now.

Reaching his room, he opened the door with the help of his elbow. Proceeding to the bed he carefully put her down so she would be sitting on it. By now she calmed down, some tears still slowly finishing the journey down her cheeks. She didn’t resist at all either, her arms easily sliding off of his shoulders. Her breath was even but she was catatonic. He wasn’t sure what to think, but maybe after all the events of this day it was a good thing for her to get a little detached. Dean let his fingers softly slide along her cheek and further though her hair. She didn’t react but he put a kiss on the top of her head reassuringly.

He wondered who he wanted to reassure more, her or himself. A sigh escaped his lips as he straightened back up.

“I’m just going to grab us something to sleep in...Will be just few steps away.” He didn’t know if she heard him but he didn’t want her to think he has left her so he tried talking. “Just a few more minutes and we can go to sleep.” He kept on talking rather irrelevant things while he swiftly changed into some pj pants and a t-shirt and pulled another one out for (Y/N). He turned back to face her. She sat exactly how he left her, no sign of her noticing that anything changed or has been said.

The hunter approached her slowly and sunk on his knees before her, trying not to think about what he needed to do, so as not to make it all awkward. After all she needed to be taken care of, and he wanted to be taking care of her in an entirely none-sexual context. He shook his head slightly.

Dean put a hand on her shoulder looking at her unfocused eyes. “I’m gonna help you get ready and comfy for sleep.” He said and internally added. _Please don’t freak out on me._ Because for once he was going to undress a woman without having any impure intentions.

Through the whole process she didn’t even stir. It was not easy with an unresponsive body but he managed and was proud of himself for making it as dignified as he could.

He laid her down on the bed putting the covers onto her. He turned the nightlight on and went to switch the big light off. Next he went to his cassette collection and briefly searched for something specific to put on before sleeping in the hopes music would keep her calm. After everything was adjusted he went back to his bed and carefully slipped under the covers. He switched the nightlight off, then turned back towards (Y/N) who was as he left her. He closed his eyes for a moment trying not to burst out in tears himself. He tried to fend off all the pesky thoughts of how he was supposed to help her. He opened his eyes again telling himself internally that he’d deal with it tomorrow. Right now he looked at her again. In the faint light of the few technical devices in his room he could see her eyes were still open.

He shifted closer to her and stretched his arms to pull her toward him, until she was securely wrapped in his arms, her head on his chest, one hand stroking her hair.

 

(Y/N) P.O.V

 

You finally stirred out of this numb paralysis. A warm, safe smell reached you first. It made you breath slightly deeper than before, as you wanted more of this nice warmth and this ‘safeness’ to fill you entirely.

 

Next you heard.

Du-dum. Du-Dum. Du-Dum.

Steady rhythm, a heartbeat? And music. It had a certain lightness to it, still being rather calm.

 

Then you felt. Warmth. A big warm body you were pressed against, arms enveloping you better than any blanket ever could.

 

You sighed.

He shifted at that, pulling back to look at your face. “How are you feeling…?” He sounded uncertain.

“Tired” You kept it simple. He put a kiss on your forehead and a slight warmth spread in your chest, the feeling starting to match all the warmth surrounding you. Yet you still felt numb, stiff. Your voice as you answered sounded like from far away, as if it wasn’t yours.

You felt something pressing to your forehead. You concentrated on your surroundings to be able to tell what it was. It proved to be his own forehead leaning on yours, your noses almost touching.

You should be feeling something, you thought but even though you were somewhat aware of your surroundings you seemed...unable to feel. Like a limb that didn’t get enough blood. It felt off. He might have said something but it was so hard to focus on anything outside of your head, that felt like a black hole pulling you into the darkness. That’s when you felt another change.

His lips on yours. Once again this evening. Soft yet firm. Not moving, just this weird...not kiss...embrace kind of thing, and his arms around you. It made you slightly dizzy, as if you weren’t bound to anything else but him. Floating in his arms. The warmth now entirely spread through your chest, seemingly filling another black hole like the one that seemingly consumed your mind and that you weren’t aware of before. Or rather you knew was there but...more dormant, lurking in the gloomy corners of your chest.

Your body relaxed. You were safe. You actual felt safe and sound for the first time in...for the first time ever. In the clouds he made for you.

Warm.

Soothing.

Floating.

You were falling into heaven.

**Author's Note:**

> If you made it through please let me know what you think :) *hugs*
> 
> And yes the Reader comes from our world and originally knows the boys from the Supernatural Series. I kind of have a prequel (and some ideas for a sequel ! X/ )to this in my head but I don't know if I'll ever write it. X0


End file.
